2020 was about awareness. 2021 is about meaningful action. But like most things, that’s easier said than done.
Last year, there was a large push for awareness around many different topics. A lot of that talk was around racial injustice and mental health. Here’s the good thing about that—when topics make it into the conversation on a regular basis, it’s often the start of real change. As people gain awareness, they eventually start to see things that can be done to help.
Just in our lifetime, we’ve witnessed this happen within other areas. Two different examples that I’ve used before in presentations are breast cancer and the LGBTQ+ community.
Years ago, breast cancer was rarely talked about. It was taboo to mention. Years ago, the LGBTQ+ community didn’t have the same rights and freedoms that others did. The real change began when it started to become more “normal” to talk about these things. Real discussions began to take place and people gained awareness.
The squeaky wheel gets the grease.
Wheels were squeaking all over the place in 2020. And that’s good because it can be a first step in the right direction. But it’s not enough. We have to learn how to grease the wheels. And that’s why in 2021, the Mike Veny brand is going to focus on helping people learn how to take Meaningful Action going forward.
It’s not enough to squeak.
Focusing on unity through belonging
I’ve noticed something concerning in the last several months. Some of the diversity and inclusion efforts have turned from focusing on “inclusion for all” to only focusing on certain groups while hushing the voices and opinions of others.
That’s not inclusion.
We cannot say that we’re effectively working toward unity and inclusion by only listening to certain groups. We can’t silence some people while allowing others to speak. If we do that, we’ve swung from one side to the other when we really should be focused on finding the middle ground.
Diversity and inclusion is about EVERYONE being represented, regardless of:
- Race
- Religion
- Gender
- Sexual orientation
- Abilities
- Political views
We can’t make one group gain importance by knocking another down. We can’t help some feel that they belong while making others believe that they don’t.
In 2021, I strongly believe that we need to go deep to listen to ALL SIDES. There is no place for “cancel culture” in our efforts or else we’re undoing the work that we’re fighting for.
Instead of Diversity & Inclusion, I believe we need to be focused on the word “belonging”.
Why I believe “belonging” matters
When it all boils down, everyone wants to “belong”. That’s the human need and desire that’s at the bottom of diversity struggles and the fight for inclusion. We all want to feel that there is a place for us in the world. Regardless of our mental health challenges, physical abilities, race, beliefs—and everything else that encompasses who we are—we want to know and feel that we belong.
With this in mind, there are two things that we can focus on here:
- How to help others feel that they belong
- How to own our role in feeling that we belong
Allow me to explain.
How to help others feel that they belong
This is where the real nitty-gritty work of diversity and inclusion needs to happen. There are areas that need to be improved in the way that we interact with each other to help people gain that sense of belonging in their lives.
Businesses that create a culture of “belonging” transform the workplace. One survey found that “93 percent agreed that a sense of belonging drives organizational performance.”
Ninety-three percent—that’s an incredible statistic that we need to pay attention to! Your organization can throw money at DE&I efforts, but if the people within your organization don’t feel that they belong, you’re not going to make the progress that you’re looking for.
So where does “belonging” begin…
The importance of empathy
I think it all starts with empathy. Psychology Today defines empathy as “the ability to recognize, understand, and share the thoughts and feelings of another person”. From watching the news and listening to the conversations happening right now, it sounds like as a whole, our society struggles in this area.
From my personal experience, I believe that one of the reasons we struggle with empathy is that we’re afraid to look at perspectives outside of our own. But here’s the thing—politely listening to the perspective of another person and trying to see things through their eyes and feel what they might be feeling doesn’t mean you have to agree with them.
It just means that you are doing your best to see things a different way and understand where they’re coming from.
Empathy cannot be forced. When the riots started back in May 2020, white people were told to shut up and listen. The message was loud and clear that there was not a place for their voices at the moment and instead, they needed to learn a new perspective. That might have appeared to work for a little bit. But in reality, it was pushed to the point where people started to be quiet out of fear of the “cancel culture”, not out of trying to gain perspective.
And look where we are today. We’re even more divided.
When your voice no longer matters and you’re told that you don’t “belong” in the conversation, most people are not going to feel open to learning new perspectives. Instead, they either withdraw or fight back to defend themselves.
If we want to foster a culture of empathy for one another, we need to learn how to deal with differences of opinion in a healthy way. You don’t have to understand and agree with the stance that a person is taking, but listening to them gives you a window into their soul.
And that’s where belonging begins.
How to own your role in feeling that you belong
Before I move on to share what’s coming from Mike Veny, Inc. in 2021, I want to touch for a moment on the second side of “belonging”, and that’s the role that you actively need to play.
It doesn’t matter how much work is done to make you feel that you belong if you refuse to believe that you do. Having the right mindset is crucial in life.
We can make all the effort in the world to show people that they belong, but if they don’t truly believe that they do, it doesn’t make any difference. It all begins on a deeply personal level within each of us.
If your workplace is spending time and resources to do team-building activities and help build relationships and really go out of their way to show that they care about employees as people, that’s great. But if you believe things like:
- My employer just doesn’t want a lawsuit on their hands
- The company just wants to look good in the news
- They’re just making the effort because they “have to”
- That person is just trying to be nice, they don’t really like me
Then, it doesn’t matter what anyone does, you will never feel like you belong.
Healthy confidence and self-awareness are important for mental health and diversity and inclusion efforts. You’ll never feel that you belong if you continue to tell yourself that you don’t.
That’s a tough message to hear
And honestly…it’s a tough message to share. I know that by sharing some of what I have, I risk being judged by people who don’t agree. But I believe that if we’re really going to start moving forward in Diversity and Inclusion efforts while balancing helping people be emotionally well, then these are messages that need to be shared.
I don’t share them because I want to stir up emotion, I share them because of what I want to see happen in this world. The reason I started working as a mental health speaker and why I continue to is because I want to help people.
Last year, I told my team that our goal was to help as many people as we could. We created free resources and I adapted presentations to be given online to continue to transform the stigma around mental health and assist as many people as possible in being emotionally healthy.
Within my team, we had difficult and awkward conversations as we worked on trying to address the changing needs of society throughout the rollercoaster of 2020. But we came out of it stronger as a team, and I believe that’s because even though we didn’t always see eye to eye on the issues, each member of my team worked to be empathetic, see different perspectives, and remain focused on helping people.
We were united in our efforts even if we weren’t always united in our beliefs. That’s okay. That’s what we need more of.
As a society, we can learn to care about people who don’t think and believe the same things as we do. And when we reach that point, I believe everyone will feel that they “belong” and the efforts of DE&I won’t be needed because we will have achieved it.
So, where do we go from here?
We can’t just grow our awareness. We can’t just grow the awareness of others. It’s not enough. We need to learn to take Meaningful Action.
That’s what Mike Veny, Inc. is dedicated to in 2021.
Meaningful Action starts with Power
Before you can take any meaningful action, you have to believe that you have the power to do it. And you do!
You have the power to help others see and feel that they belong (even if you don’t agree with them). You have the power to take steps on your own too. Overall, people are incredibly more powerful than they realize.
There are countless stories about how one person took one little meaningful step in life and it snowballed into something much bigger. It’s the child who started collecting donated socks and gloves to pass out to the homeless. It’s the C-level executives who invite someone new to the boardroom to gain a fresh perspective in the conversation. And it’s the five-second text that you send someone to check in with them when you get the feeling that something is wrong.
We all have the power to create meaningful change in our world, and it’s achieved through meaningful action.
Here’s my plan to help in 2021
The Mike Veny brand is focused on helping businesses and individuals take “meaningful action” for their mental health and unity. You may be wondering what that looks like.
Here’s some of what you can expect from us this year:
More content with actionable tips. I’m focusing on providing more videos, blog posts, and free resources with actionable tips for businesses and individuals. These will address key topics and issues that we’re facing in life today along with the specific things we can do to be emotionally well while also fostering a culture of belonging within organizations.
If you haven’t subscribed to my YouTube channel, I invite you to subscribe so you can see all the latest videos as they are released. There is a new video each week.
Additional online courses. In the spring of 2020, I created an online course called “How to Find Peace in Times of Uncertainty“. Many people found this to be a helpful way to learn more about a topic they were interested in or needed at the moment because they could work through it on their own timeline.
There are going to be additional courses coming out in the website store throughout the year on a wide range of mental health and diversity and inclusion topics. These courses can be used by individuals or organizations as a whole. They are all being created through the lens of providing actionable steps that people can take to create meaningful change around them.
Continued support. The reason why I do what I do is that I care about you. As someone who has struggled with mental health challenges, there are days when I’d rather not get out of bed. Just like you, I have days when the news of the world seems overwhelming and like it’s too much to handle.
But the thought that my message could be the thing that someone needs to hear that day keeps me going. Even on those hard days.
In 2021, I will continue to monitor the current situation to see what pivots and shifts need to happen to address the ever-changing climate of our world.
I invite you to play a role in creating meaningful change through meaningful action this year. Subscribe on YouTube and join my email list to stay up to date on the latest. And most importantly, continue to focus on your own mental health and wellbeing because that’s where it all begins.
Here’s to a meaningful 2021.
